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If your child is terrified of dogs — even the tiniest, calmest, leash-clipped Chihuahua — you are not alone. It’s common for toddlers and preschoolers to develop sudden, intense fears. And when that fear is dogs, it can seriously disrupt your daily life.
Walks become stressful, and visiting friends or family with dogs might be off the table. Even a trip to the park can set off a meltdown — whether a dog is loose, across the field, on a leash, or approaching your child.
This blog post will walk you through exactly what to do when your child is scared of dogs without forcing anything. You’ll learn how to create a sense of safety, build confidence, and slowly shift your child’s fear over time. I’ll also share my own story, because I’ve been through it, too. Michelle Charriere, who is an Early Childhood Mental Health Specialist and the founder of Babies and Brains, will shed light on why children under 5 are especially susceptible to developing fears and how to help them. Michelle is a mom of a toddler (soon to be a mom of 2), and recently said goodbye to their beloved family dog.
There are many reasons your child suddenly becomes afraid of dogs or has never felt comfortable around them. Maybe a dog jumped on your child, knocked them over, came up too close too fast, wouldn't stop licking them, or scratched or snapped at your child.
Michelle: “Children under 5 are especially susceptible to developing fears due to their brain being in a rapid period of development. Young children have to use cues from the world around them to develop an understanding of their context. Children under 5 are primarily using their caregiver’s facial expressions, tone, and interactions to “get a read” on how they should feel about the new people, places, and things they encounter. If a child observes that their caregiver is anxious, hesitant, or fearful of animals, the child will pick up on this and determine that the stimuli is not safe. Since young children have underdeveloped frontal lobes, they also struggle with self-regulation.
The sensory input from a dog (a loud bark, a wet lick on the face or arm, their fast-moving bodies, etc) paired with the potential unpredictability of an animal, can put a child in “fight or flight” mode and perceive the animal as a threat.
The child will then need an adult to help them self-regulate since this skill isn’t yet fully developed. Between the ages of 2 and 5, children also struggle with abstract thinking and will primarily rely on hands-on experiences. If they have had a negative experience with an animal, they may have difficulty understanding that not ALL animals are this way. Their body may go into a fight or flight response to ensure they are protected, even if the present animal isn’t threatening or harmful.”
When my daughter was 2.5 years old, I took her to a puppy-and-toddler class. It seemed like a great idea at the time — exposure, socializing, cuteness. But during that class, a bigger puppy jumped on her. Twice. That was all it took.
From that day on, even the sight of a small dog at the end of the street would send her into panic. She’d scream, freeze, and climb into my arms. She acted as though a lion was charging at her full speed. The only dog she was comfortable with was our Labrador, Lola.
After that class, I couldn't walk down our street without her panicking. We had to change our usual walking routes. Even the faintest sound of a dog — barking from a backyard, jingling tags in the distance — she would freeze in place and panic. I had to carry her home more times than I can count.
At the playground, she constantly scanned for dogs. If she saw one off-leash in the distance, she'd abandon the swings or slides immediately. Birthday parties and family visits became more complicated. I felt frustrated, heartbroken, and deeply guilty. I took her to that class. I hadn’t anticipated this. And now everything we did had to be adjusted around one fear.
If This Is Happening to You, You’re Not Alone
If your child is suddenly terrified of dogs, it’s easy to feel helpless and frustrated. I see you. I’ve been you. And I want you to know: it can get better.
Start by managing your own emotional state. This will ensure you are regulated and confident when you implement the plan below. This stage is about helping your child feel secure again.
Remember, if they could choose not to be afraid, they would.
These simple adjustments helped build confidence in my daughter and relieved stress in me. After a while, my daughter started paying attention to the leash and pointing it out. She would point and be able to shift her attention back to something else without panicking.
Michelle: Since young children have underdeveloped frontal lobes, they require the process of co-regulation to help calm their nervous system. The key to co-regulation is a regulated (enough) caregiver. This means that the caregiver has control over their own emotional state. When the caregiver is regulated and confident, and then connects with the child through their proximity, words, tone, touch, etc, that sends a message to the child’s nervous system that they are safe. It actually teaches their nervous system to regulate through distressing experiences.
Every person your child spends time with needs to follow the same approach. Educate them about what’s working and what your child needs. Have clear guidelines on what to do whenever dogs are nearby.
This phase can last anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. If there’s a friendly but aloof dog (aloof is key!) in your social circle — one that’s not interested in children — and your child expresses interest, you can consider moving to the next step.
Once your child no longer panics when seeing dogs from a distance, you can start gently shifting the narrative.
Choose books that show friendly, relaxed dogs. A few favorites:
Reading about dogs can help build familiarity with zero pressure.
Show your child photos or videos of dogs. If you know a specific dog your child might eventually meet, ask the owner for a photo to share with them. Talk about the dog: their name, favorite activity, and something silly the dog does.
This helps your child feel like they already know the dog before meeting them in real life.
Check out the Lola’s Planet videos we created.
My children follow one account on Instagram - Good Boy Ollie. They absolutely love following the adventures of Ollie and Tato.
Pick out a plush dog together. Let your child name it, walk it on a leash, pretend to feed it, brush it — anything that builds positive associations.
See our recommendations here.
2. Use Pretend Play
Act out scenes with their toy dog, such as going for walks, saying hello, and barking softly. This kind of play helps children work through their fears at their own pace.
This is a big one. Move to this step once you start noticing a visible improvement and your child expresses interest in meeting a dog.
A jumpy or overly affectionate dog (even a small one) is not a good match at this stage.
Sometimes, the first visit is just an observation. That’s a win.
Sometimes, your child might not be ready yet. Don’t force any interactions. If your child needs more time, schedule another interaction. Follow the same protocol or tweak it to make the meeting even easier on your child.
If it goes well, you can plan another interaction, always following your child’s lead.
Michelle: First, if the caregiver is struggling to support their child through their fears and responses, it can be beneficial to seek support.
Since a regulated and confident caregiver is crucial in supporting a child to feel confident and safe, it is important that the parent receives the support they may need.
This can look like a parent coaching service, a group support, a therapist for the parent, or a child therapist that includes the parent in sessions. Support like this could help the parent understand their own discomfort and fears and feel more regulated and confident to be able to support their child.
When looking specifically at the child, we want to consider a few things:
If a child is struggling in any of these ways, it could be helpful to seek a child therapist who specializes in stress and trauma. A child therapist who involves the parent in some way is especially appropriate and helpful for children under age 6.
*It’s important to note that children under 5 struggle with impulse control, aggression, concentration, etc, due to their underdeveloped brains. You would want to look out for big changes (new behavior, or increased frequency, intensity, and duration), rather than just the presence of the behavior itself.
A big part of helping your child feel safe is learning how to read dog body language and teaching them to do the same in age-appropriate ways.
Dogs communicate so much through their posture, ears, tails, movement, and facial expressions. Understanding these signals helps reduce surprises, avoid risky moments, and build confidence for you and your child.
The more confident you feel reading dogs, the more confident your child will feel being around them.
+Dog Body Language Course - Learn to read your dog's body language so your child and your dog stay safe.
+Doggie Language: A Dog Lover's Guide to Understanding Your Best Friend by Lili Chin
It tells the heartwarming story of Lola, a dog who wants to feel safe. Through the book’s illustrations, Lola shows a range of emotions—from joy and happiness to discomfort and fear. By learning to read Lola's body language, children who are scared of dogs can see that dogs also want to be safe, which can help them feel more comfortable and confident around them.
After about 8-10 weeks of the STEP 1 training, my daughter became more relaxed around dogs. She was not panicked, she would stay at the playground or ride her bike if the dogs were at a safe distance. We moved on to STEP 2 and 3, reading stories about dogs, pointing out their body language on walks, and playing with dog stuffies. After about 12 weeks, and because I had started noticing a significant improvement, I brought home a Vizsla I was training at the time — Farrah. She was not jumpy, and she was friendly but a little afraid of kids herself, which worked perfectly. I was managing their interactions very carefully, but Farrah gave my daughter the space she needed. Over the course of a few days, they began to get used to each other, a therapeutic experience for my daughter and Farrah.
Later, I brought home Minnie, a 5-month-old Maltipoo. Small, fluffy, playful — and yes, a bit jumpy — but the size made all the difference. My daughter didn’t mind when Minnie jumped up occasionally because she was so small. She adored Minnie. That was a turning point.
Over time, she got more confident. We were able to go on walks without panic. We could visit friends who had dogs again. We all exhaled.
If you’re in the thick of it — just start with step one. That’s enough for today.
You’re doing a great job. Your child’s fear doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong. And with time, patience, and support, it can get better.
The goal is for the child to feel comfortable around dogs, have skills, and feel safe if a dog is nearby. The interaction with a dog is NOT a necessary step!
Word of caution: If there is a dog in your child’s social circle that might scare them, e.g., a big, jumpy, and mouthy dog, make sure to have a rock-solid management plan to help your child feel safe and not ruin the progress your child has made.
Learn to read your dog's body language so your child and your dog stay safe.
See what parents have to say about our courses HERE.
offers two courses: Parenting Through Attachment and The Toddler Tantrums Course.
Online resources to help your baby and dog get along—right from the start and as they grow up together.
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